The Power of Sports: A Double-Edged Sword
The world of American professional sports is a complex and multifaceted entity, capable of bringing people together and inspiring hope in times of darkness. The New Orleans Saints’ Super Bowl victory after Hurricane Katrina is a testament to the transformative power of sports. Similarly, the Los Angeles Rams’ playoff win over the Minnesota Vikings brought joy to celebrities who had lost everything in a devastating wildfire. However, there is a darker side to sports that cannot be ignored.
The Dark Underbelly of Sports
Every few years, society comes together to shame a billion-dollar company into rebranding, and it’s only a matter of time before we strike again. By my calculations, at least 16 teams are one viral incident away from a PR nightmare, and will someday be forced to hold an online vote to determine which new family-friendly nickname their fans will hate the least.
Atlanta Braves: A Ticking Time Bomb?
The Atlanta Braves seem to be the next professional sports organization in line for a nickname change. Despite avoiding the fate of the Washington Redskins and Cleveland Indians, who rebranded in 2020, the Braves’ partnership with Native American communities may not be enough to save them. The voices of benevolent Americans who are unaffected by the name may ultimately outweigh those of the few remaining Native Americans who benefit from the Braves’ current moniker.
Chicago Blackhawks: A Logo Under Fire
Unlike the Braves, the Chicago Blackhawks do not have the full-throated support of Native American communities in the Chicago area. The Blackhawks’ logo depicts an Indian named Black Hawk, whose descendants have called for the team to stop using his image. Despite the controversy, the Blackhawks’ jersey remains a beloved classic, making it difficult to convince fans to part ways with a logo that looks so sharp on a sweater.
Kansas City Chiefs: A Culture Under Siege
The Kansas City Chiefs round out the Native American portion of this discussion. Native American-themed nicknames are most susceptible to change, as they involve real people who can be pointed to and said to be having their culture mocked. There’s a disconnect between Native Americans and sports fans who use their culture as a costume, because to many, their culture is objectively cool.
Pittsburgh Pirates: A Pirate’s Life for Me?
Despite the destruction caused by pirates during the Golden Age of Piracy, they’re looked back on with rose-colored glasses. When we think of pirates, we don’t think about their unspeakable acts of violence or the number of lives they ruined. Maybe it’s because Blackbeard carried out his atrocities with a wise-cracking parrot on his shoulder. Or because his merry men sang fun sea shanties as they tied men up and raped their wives. Or more realistically, that’s just what 400 years of time does.
Milwaukee Brewers: A Brew of Controversy
One alcohol-related death occurs every 39 minutes in the United States alone. 11,000 people die each year from drunk driving accidents. In November 2021, Raiders’ wide receiver Henry Ruggs, with a blood alcohol level of 0.16, crashed his Corvette at 156mph on a Las Vegas city street, killing a lady and her dog. Henry Ruggs is up for parole next year. If he can still run a 4.2, he may be back on an NFL roster. But for the rest of their lives, the family of the lady who Henry Ruggs killed will be forced to relive that moment every time the Milwaukee Brewers take the field, and fans celebrate the people who effectively killed their daughter by brewing the evil elixir that made Henry Ruggs’ drunken joy ride possible.
New York Jets: A Name That’s Taking Flight
A lot of people thought the New York Jets would undergo a rebrand immediately following 9/11. A New York City football team that crashes and burns season after season being named after Osama Bin Laden’s weapon of choice would be too ironic to keep around. But amidst a major national security overhaul and a full-blown war in the Middle East, the New York Jets’ triggering nickname managed to slip through the cracks. Now that the memory of 9/11 is all but forgotten, jets pose a whole new problem for society: carbon emissions.
San Diego Padres: A Dark History
The origin of the San Diego Padres’ nickname dates back to the Spanish missions in California. The Spanish missions were “communities” set up across California in the late 1700s by the Spanish Empire. As part of the expansion of New Spain, they wanted to shove Christianity down the indigenous people’s throats. The missions were led by Spanish priests, aka Friars, aka Padres, who’s goal was to convert the locals into Christians. As a part of these missions, unmarried indigenous girls as young as 7 years old were separated from their families and shipped off to special houses called Monjerios. The Monjerios were bad. The living conditions in the Monjerios were likened to a prison. The girls were used for labor. They were allegedly beaten and raped by the Padres.
This concludes part 1 of “Genocide, Terrorism, Alcohol: Professional Sports Teams Liable to Be Bullied Into a Name Change.” Part 2 coming soon. You’d be surprised how many problematic teams you can identify when you put your cancelling pants on and start looking at things through a “Why are they bad?” lens. I’ve got at least 7 more teams who are ripe for a PR nightmare if the wrong person makes a fuss.
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