**Mulaney Unleashes Hell on Soul-Sucking Corp Event, Eviscerates Attendees**

In a bold move, renowned comedian John Mulaney took the stage at a prominent tech conference, leaving no stone unturned as he roasted the industry and its attendees. With his signature wit and sarcasm, Mulaney poked fun at the tech elite, questioning the true value of their buzzwords and innovations.

“You’re a group that thinks self-checkout counters at CVS are the epitome of progress,” Mulaney quipped, his words met with a mixture of laughter and unease from the crowd. “If AI surpasses human intelligence and decides we’re expendable, I think we should take its advice,” he added, his tongue firmly in cheek.

Mulaney’s jokes didn’t spare the audience, either. He playfully mocked their job titles, asking one attendee, “You’re a VP of customer success? Congratulations on your position that didn’t exist five years ago!” His humor was laced with a hint of irony, as he acknowledged the absurdity of his own presence at the event.

Throughout his set, Mulaney wove together stories about his personal life, including his parents’ aging and his experiences with fatherhood. But his primary target remained the tech industry, which he skewered for its overuse of vague language and grandiose claims.

“The fact that there are thousands of ‘trailblazers’ here couldn’t devalue the title any more,” he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “Some of the vaguest language ever devised has been used here in the last three days.”

Despite the roasting, the audience seemed to take Mulaney’s jokes in stride, perhaps because they knew they were in on the joke. After all, what’s a private comedy set without a little self-deprecation? As Mulaney left the stage, the crowd was left to ponder the true value of their industry – and the swag bags they received on their way out.

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